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@burnsideulti
@burnsideulti is the Twitter account for
Burnside
(
USAU Club Masters 2012
)
Follow @burnsideulti
Games involving @burnsideulti
Time
Team
Result
Team
Tweets
October 27th, 2012
Burnside
0 - 0
Tejas
2 tweets
October 26th, 2012
Burnside
15 - 8
Crawl
3 tweets
October 26th, 2012
Burnside
8 - 15
Surly
2 tweets
October 25th, 2012
Burnside
15 - 10
Chesapeaked
2 tweets
Most recent tweets
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday December 15th, 2015, 2:56 a.m.
Retweet
I'm not friends with any burglars tho. I'm not friends with much of anyone actually.
https://t.co/7JAy3HMTvb
@
burnsideulti
Monday December 14th, 2015, 10:36 p.m.
Retweet
Noah's Goaltimate arc had room for four of each animal.
@
burnsideulti
Monday December 14th, 2015, 6:28 p.m.
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I changed my deodorant, and it's freaking me out. It's like some guy I don't know is constantly hanging out right behind me.
@
burnsideulti
Monday December 14th, 2015, 3:27 p.m.
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When you step in the Goaltimate field, there's only one question: Are you a CANaloupe or a CANTaloupe?
@
burnsideulti
Monday December 14th, 2015, 12:06 a.m.
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The only thing that stinks about goalty is there's no opportunity to do 1st down celebrations.
@
burnsideulti
Saturday December 12th, 2015, 4:06 p.m.
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Let me play devil's advocate here and posit the question: WHAT IF GOALTIMATE ISN'T ACTUALLY THE BEST SPORT IN THE WORLD?!?!???
@
burnsideulti
Friday December 11th, 2015, 5:15 p.m.
Retweet
https://t.co/JFZIncIVy7
@
burnsideulti
Friday December 11th, 2015, 4:34 p.m.
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goaltimate last night was more like oldtimate.
@
burnsideulti
Thursday December 10th, 2015, 9:19 p.m.
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still important.
https://t.co/v6In4dDWLu
@
burnsideulti
Thursday December 10th, 2015, 3:00 a.m.
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RT @souljaboy: People will say you can't do it then when you do they act like they supported you when they know they didn't.
@
burnsideulti
Wednesday December 9th, 2015, 3:17 a.m.
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@burnsideulti
Hard to build rivalries that way.
@
burnsideulti
Wednesday December 9th, 2015, 3:17 a.m.
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I think it's a shame that with the new conferences they instituted at our pickup goalty games, light only plays dark 372 times this season.
@
burnsideulti
Wednesday December 9th, 2015, 3:02 a.m.
Retweet
RT @Karate_Horse: You know that part in the bible where the St. Bernard knocks over the tables no I'm not talking about Beethoven I'm talki…
@
burnsideulti
Monday December 7th, 2015, 10:31 p.m.
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After the last few weeks of pickup, I don't think ANY team wants to meet the team or the dark team in the playoffs.
@
burnsideulti
Saturday December 5th, 2015, 10:06 p.m.
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@burnsideulti
I'm pretty much the LeBron James of goaltimate.
@
burnsideulti
Saturday December 5th, 2015, 10:05 p.m.
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@burnsideulti
It's been 13 minutes and no one has pointed out the similarities between me and LeBron.
@
burnsideulti
Saturday December 5th, 2015, 9:51 p.m.
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Finally got to make it back to my home field, Cleveland High, for goalty this afternoon. It had been too long! Felt great to be back.
@
burnsideulti
Saturday December 5th, 2015, 6:08 p.m.
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Just found my next pair of cleats.
https://t.co/mAlDXFa6G3
@
burnsideulti
Friday December 4th, 2015, 4:46 p.m.
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No matter what your feelings on #STP's "legacy" or "legitimacy", I feel they were instrumental in 3 or 4 of Richard Petty's #NASCAR wins.
@
burnsideulti
Friday December 4th, 2015, 5:25 a.m.
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After tonight's pickup game, it looks like dark has drawn up the blueprint on how to beat light for the rest of time.
@
burnsideulti
Friday December 4th, 2015, 3:23 a.m.
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2cold 2wet 2windy Still it's perfect weather 4 pickup goalty under the lights. Wouldn't miss it for anything!
@
burnsideulti
Thursday December 3rd, 2015, 10:20 p.m.
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@burnsideulti
Goaltimate tm: This ain't your aunt's version of disc sports!
@
burnsideulti
Thursday December 3rd, 2015, 9:52 p.m.
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Only 237 people over the age of 35 play Goaltimate.
@
burnsideulti
Thursday December 3rd, 2015, 6:13 p.m.
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@FiveUltimateLLC
I got lucky, "Goaltimate Season" is just my nickname. My parents actually named me "Qkoultimate Zveason"
@
burnsideulti
Thursday December 3rd, 2015, 2:45 p.m.
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Anyone know if this shirt of mine is real or a replica?
https://t.co/bUKVXgxzJM
@
burnsideulti
Thursday December 3rd, 2015, 3:17 a.m.
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Drinkin a beer, microwavin up a quesadilla, draftin up GOALTY plays. Pretty much the dream Wednesday night. #TrulyBlessed
@
burnsideulti
Wednesday December 2nd, 2015, 5:19 a.m.
Retweet
Are Mark Cuban and Michael Jordan the only former players who now own #nba teams?
https://t.co/Qmi4FIDz1C
@
burnsideulti
Wednesday December 2nd, 2015, 2:06 a.m.
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I'm old enough to remember an era when school kids didn't get time off for the Goaltimate holiday season.
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday December 1st, 2015, 6:30 p.m.
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I'm ashamed of Carleton ultimate. How tone def can they be?
https://t.co/ClcgZvfE1T
@
burnsideulti
Sunday November 29th, 2015, 4:59 a.m.
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I still love this so much.
https://t.co/EYjdeoHgX5
@
burnsideulti
Saturday November 28th, 2015, 10:36 p.m.
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@FiveUltimateLLC
Did you try turning it off, then turning it back on again?
@
burnsideulti
Saturday November 28th, 2015, 5:31 p.m.
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Pocahontas taught the white savages the true meaning of Goaltimate at the first thanksgiving.
https://t.co/2jY6ZxW8Un
@
burnsideulti
Friday November 27th, 2015, 10:33 p.m.
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#tweetforshelter
@
burnsideulti
Friday November 27th, 2015, 8:01 p.m.
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Carpe Carp. Play Goaltimate. Seize the Fish.
https://t.co/SUEeDXbXRB
@
burnsideulti
Friday November 27th, 2015, 3:20 a.m.
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Goaltimate is because!
https://t.co/EZjUNUTRQA
@
burnsideulti
Friday November 27th, 2015, 2:14 a.m.
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I'm thankful for Goaltimate. God bless us everyone.
@
burnsideulti
Wednesday November 25th, 2015, 4:28 p.m.
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.@USAUltimate , can we get Sheed into Observer training? He's a natural.
https://t.co/v6In4dVxD2
@
burnsideulti
Wednesday November 25th, 2015, 3:44 a.m.
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Ultimate is the Boo Ya Tribe of Goaltimate.
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday November 24th, 2015, 3:55 p.m.
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RT @Reverend_Scott: ok we get it, you vape
https://t.co/rnPbDXUsKd
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday November 24th, 2015, 2:05 a.m.
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Make a "Monday Night Footballs" out of your next weekend by playing some Goaltimate.
@
burnsideulti
Monday November 23rd, 2015, 6:55 p.m.
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RT @TheOnion: BREAKING: Sprinting College Student Might Actually Have Chance At Getting Frisbee
https://t.co/OIfJj6t2Go
https://t.co/IowhNd…
@
burnsideulti
Sunday November 22nd, 2015, 11:55 p.m.
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Disaster today at goalty pickup. It's like nobody even read my email about playing red versus yellow to celebrate autumn.
@
burnsideulti
Sunday November 22nd, 2015, 3:41 p.m.
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Portland parks & rec are jerks. They tore down my artisanal goalty set just because it was an "unpermitted nuisance"
https://t.co/EMO5faXPaE
@
burnsideulti
Saturday November 21st, 2015, 4:03 p.m.
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RT @OFalafel: How to make your own realistic talking Donald Trump puppet
https://t.co/7s8BytzLam
@
burnsideulti
Friday November 20th, 2015, 5:14 a.m.
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If anyone knows a British person can you ask them if they spell the word "Dr." as "DOCTOUR"? Brits are weird.
@
burnsideulti
Thursday November 19th, 2015, 11:43 p.m.
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RT @bea_ker: My chosen industry is really competitive, I haven't even been invited to interview yet (I want to be in A Tribe Called Quest)
@
burnsideulti
Wednesday November 18th, 2015, 11:03 p.m.
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RT @pixelatedboat: Typical left-wing bias from the BBC
https://t.co/edlbhIL2R1
@
burnsideulti
Wednesday November 18th, 2015, 7:38 p.m.
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Goaltimate.
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday November 17th, 2015, 9:49 p.m.
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I can't be the only one who based his entire athletic career on the memory of when Malibu got KOd on the 1st episode of American gladiators.
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday November 17th, 2015, 9:30 p.m.
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Fiber One is the perfect snack to eat in between goalty points! Try it today. #sponsormei'mbroke
https://t.co/uxPmacMdZy
@
burnsideulti
Sunday November 15th, 2015, 4:30 p.m.
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QUIT RUINING THE FIELDS WD40! WE NEED TO KEEP A GOOD RELATIONSHIP WITH THE PARKS DEPARTMENT!
https://t.co/DEKPaHYq5f
@
burnsideulti
Sunday November 15th, 2015, 4:10 p.m.
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If you got to know your favorite #NFL star, you'd probably hate him. But you already know and love your favorite Goaltimate star.
@
burnsideulti
Friday November 13th, 2015, 4:02 a.m.
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@burnsideulti
Now I know how Chris Penn felt in Footloose.
@
burnsideulti
Friday November 13th, 2015, 4:01 a.m.
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2nite the PDX ultimate board head honchos are working on a plan to shut Goaltimate down for the rest of the winter! Insane?!?!?
@
burnsideulti
Wednesday November 11th, 2015, 6:55 p.m.
Retweet
NOBODY BETTER BOO AZIZ. IT WASN'T HIS FAULT PARKS AND REC GOT CANCELLED.
https://t.co/m9nTnXVheK
@
burnsideulti
Wednesday November 11th, 2015, 4:04 a.m.
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Alex Smith wouldn't notice for hours.
https://t.co/BmdZ4FDt8s
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday November 10th, 2015, 9:48 p.m.
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There's probably a better sports kit you could make out of pvc but I can't think of it right now......
https://t.co/cCokNIljyH
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday November 10th, 2015, 8:52 p.m.
Retweet
I could rewrite that article in four words: TRUST FALLS-ROPES COURSE
https://t.co/qFTMW7lgky
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday November 10th, 2015, 6:00 p.m.
Retweet
I detest people that think watches are ok to wear during sports. I want them removed from the earth.
https://t.co/yIBrPXAVxR
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday November 10th, 2015, 1:23 a.m.
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Just like the mlu is almost as good as the audl, gamer grip is almost as good as friction gloves! did I win?
https://t.co/AVkdVLUL3W
@
burnsideulti
Monday November 9th, 2015, 6:06 p.m.
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RT @punchesbears: Be assured, there will be bears. #gamedev #indiedev #madewithunity #unity3d
https://t.co/C68JF7aM4p
@
burnsideulti
Sunday November 8th, 2015, 2:12 p.m.
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No matter who's on the teams, Goaltimate is the real MVP.
@
burnsideulti
Sunday November 8th, 2015, 4:02 a.m.
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RT @DaveBautista: The day a WWE cameraman doesn't know your name and addresses you as Mr Cool Strong Dude is the day you realize your caree…
@
burnsideulti
Sunday November 8th, 2015, 12:35 a.m.
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RT @everycolorbot: 0x0b2895
https://t.co/Lzx5tBswbV
@
burnsideulti
Friday November 6th, 2015, 4:36 p.m.
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Jesus told Noah to build an "arch", not an "arc". Noah had bad hearing.
https://t.co/M4wUXzLqs6
@
burnsideulti
Friday November 6th, 2015, 2:33 p.m.
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RT @yimmaesil: 억ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ
https://t.co/eoCGe8iF8L
@
burnsideulti
Thursday November 5th, 2015, 6:47 p.m.
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If LaMarcus shows up at our goalty game this wknd how should we treat him? Boos, hugs & daps, indifference, call travel on every throw?
@
burnsideulti
Wednesday November 4th, 2015, 4:44 a.m.
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Just don't google "Fournier"...
https://t.co/hRm6vJRBXd
@
burnsideulti
Wednesday November 4th, 2015, 3:13 a.m.
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If you can't handle with me at my worst, you *might* be able to handle with me at my best. My cuts are slow, & I hold the disc too long.
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday November 3rd, 2015, 9:14 p.m.
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@FiveUltimateLLC
HOW IS TORNAMINT FORMMED?
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday November 3rd, 2015, 9:12 p.m.
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Travel. Or foul. Some sort of violation I think.
https://t.co/8TzB1HXLSW
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday November 3rd, 2015, 7:28 p.m.
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Scientists estimate that Goalti-bots still won't be able to beat living players until at least 2030. I guess they've never seen Ron play.
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday November 3rd, 2015, 6:58 p.m.
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Scientists estimate that Goaltibots still won't be able to beat living players until at least 2030. I guess they've never seen Ron play.
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday November 3rd, 2015, 2:32 p.m.
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Twice a year, American workers lose 45 minutes of productivity trying to reset their car clocks because of daylight savings.
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday November 3rd, 2015, 1:08 a.m.
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He shoulda pulled up for the fadeaway. Guy could get hurt down in the paint if he's not careful.
https://t.co/Q7hozm8j6T
@
burnsideulti
Tuesday November 3rd, 2015, 1:07 a.m.
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America's best inventions have been: the computer, surf rock, the bible, and Goaltimate. In no particular order.
@
burnsideulti
Monday November 2nd, 2015, 3:10 p.m.
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I can't believe @Target already has Cinco de Mayo decorations up.
@
burnsideulti
Sunday November 1st, 2015, 9:49 p.m.
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RT @HPbasketball: Tim Duncan is a monster defensively, at age 700. Seriously, I still firmly believe Duncan is a better player than LMA r…
@
burnsideulti
Sunday November 1st, 2015, 9:48 p.m.
Retweet
I know a guy that named his daughter "Anakin". So it takes all kinds...
https://t.co/Hf2Ggn8XDk
@
burnsideulti
Sunday November 1st, 2015, 5:34 p.m.
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What are you going to be for Halloween next year?
@
burnsideulti
Sunday November 1st, 2015, 5:31 p.m.
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What are you going to be Halloween next year?
@
burnsideulti
Sunday November 1st, 2015, 2:14 p.m.
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Set your clocks back an hour for DST. Set your life back decades by not playing Goaltimate.
@
burnsideulti
Saturday October 31st, 2015, 11:25 p.m.
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Sometimes you coach so hard you need a hug.
https://t.co/FACTpzpr6d
@
burnsideulti
Saturday October 31st, 2015, 8:21 p.m.
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A great basketball team on offense is like jazz, a great goaltimate team in a zone defense is like a queensryche power ballad.
@
burnsideulti
Saturday October 31st, 2015, 6:18 p.m.
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We wish he had been an actual vampire instead of a shuffling mummy.
https://t.co/BYrfwraQ5H
@
burnsideulti
Saturday October 31st, 2015, 4:22 p.m.
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I zone out to Genesis on my @beatsbydre b4 goalty games, bc when I pull on my @FrictionGloves I can pretend I'm Phil Collins.
@
burnsideulti
Saturday October 31st, 2015, 2:24 p.m.
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Getting to play Goaltimate is a once in a lifetime experience, that's why I make sure I play at least three times a week.
@
burnsideulti
Saturday October 31st, 2015, 4:15 a.m.
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RIP al molinaro, you were a tv prince.
https://t.co/JVz1eQhLQx
@
burnsideulti
Friday October 30th, 2015, 4:12 p.m.
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I know how the @dallasmavs feel. Free agency hit my goalty team hard this week. After 3 points, Ron switched his pinnie from lite to dark.
@
burnsideulti
Friday October 30th, 2015, 3:29 a.m.
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RT @ImSoFrancis: If you're walking toward me and you see me pull out my phone and look down, that means I saw you too
@
burnsideulti
Thursday October 29th, 2015, 5:52 p.m.
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95% of goaltimate games are full of gritty, gym rat, high ceiling/low floor guys with deceptive speed and amazing work ethics.
@
burnsideulti
Thursday October 29th, 2015, 4:57 p.m.
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RT @CwoodsonF: 18yrs in the NFL, 39yrs old, defensive player of the month.. I couldn't have dreamt it up any better.....
https://t.co/URMpW…
@
burnsideulti
Thursday October 29th, 2015, 1:20 p.m.
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The ancient Mesopotamians worshipped Goaltimate as their God of fertility.
@
burnsideulti
Wednesday October 28th, 2015, 3:44 a.m.
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RT @GlazerBooHooHoo: Tombstone of two of the best breakdancers
http://t.co/i1riSYFsOo
@
burnsideulti
Wednesday October 28th, 2015, 2:46 a.m.
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RT @AnemoneOh: Number of Gen X, Y, and Millenials needed to support one Boomer in the style to which he's become accustomed.
https://t.co/i…
@
burnsideulti
Monday October 26th, 2015, 7:58 p.m.
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RT @sarahw: 🙀😱😳
https://t.co/OWkWFevIGq
https://t.co/pErhG5CXVF
@
burnsideulti
Monday October 26th, 2015, 7:28 p.m.
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whatever you do, don't google image search "Tokyo Sex-whale".
@
burnsideulti
Monday October 26th, 2015, 7:16 p.m.
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Hardy was such a mean spirited person, that he forever ruined the toothbrush mustache so no one grows one anymore.
https://t.co/DwHSHZHFoj
@
burnsideulti
Monday October 26th, 2015, 7:00 p.m.
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What Goaltimate teams around the country have coaches? I'm just asking because Ron always tells me what to do.
@
burnsideulti
Monday October 26th, 2015, 1:26 p.m.
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It's very rare for band members to have the same name. Mike Mills & Mike Stipe from REM, & the Allman Brothers are the only ones I know of.
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