@ChicagoNemesis

@ChicagoNemesis is the Twitter account for Nemesis (USAU Club Women's 2012)

Games involving @ChicagoNemesis
Time Team Result Team Tweets
October 27th, 2012 Nemesis 8 - 11 Molly Brown 21 tweets
October 27th, 2012 Nemesis 12 - 9 Capitals 24 tweets
October 26th, 2012 Nemesis 15 - 9 Brute Squad 30 tweets
October 26th, 2012 Nemesis 5 - 15 Fury 19 tweets
October 25th, 2012 Nemesis 15 - 4 Schwa 21 tweets
October 25th, 2012 Nemesis 16 - 14 Capitals 31 tweets
October 25th, 2012 Nemesis 15 - 16 Scandal 32 tweets
October 25th, 2012 Nemesis 15 - 16 Scandal 32 tweets
Most recent tweets
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:58 p.m. Retweet
Can you tell me how the game of ultimate is played? Public defender: just sit down and start crying / be confused
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:58 p.m. Retweet
Reenactment done by social worker, Allie Fish. WOOOOOOOOOOOO YAHHHHHHHH.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:57 p.m. Retweet
I'm going to ignore all claims of your insanity because this is how I get my paycheck. That's not fair.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:56 p.m. Retweet
What is your name? Anne Hemmelgarn. Are you insane? Do you have a diagnosed mental illness? Yes.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:56 p.m. Retweet
Who is your doctor? Allie Fish. No, Kristol. Wait, I'm confused. We may have a case here.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:56 p.m. Retweet
Before I let the prosecutor badger my witness, I'd like to call in my social worker. I think we may have an insanity case.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:55 p.m. Retweet
Before I swear you in, I'd like to express my personal disappointment, b/c I was the one who threw the huck &I wanted you to be in the EZ.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:55 p.m. Retweet
Are you disappointed in me or in you? I'm not sure.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:54 p.m. Retweet
RT @madiwerb: @ChicagoNemesis Let the record show that the @wildwestjanes love you guys right now ❤️❤️#jltl #nemelove #dammitpatrice
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:53 p.m. Retweet
We would periscope, but you know, ESPN rights.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:53 p.m. Retweet
Now we will hear Nemesis v. Anne for excessive celebration. And politeness.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:53 p.m. Retweet
RT @PulledDisc: It is easier to understand whatever the expletive #malortcourt thing @ChicagoNemesis is doing on twitter than @ESPN3 semis …
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:51 p.m. Retweet
To commemorate, the RBF club has an Abby RBF cake. http://t.co/qekiRVkiCO
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:51 p.m. Retweet
Let the record show that Jackie's malort shot tasted like poop.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:50 p.m. Retweet
Abby Shure has been officially inducted into the Resting Bitch Face.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:47 p.m. Retweet
#malortcourt is separate from all other jurisdictions. There is no law that we can't try Jackie again for the same crime!
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:47 p.m. Retweet
Therefore, we'd like Jackie to take another shot of malort. Half shot. Three-quarters shot.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:46 p.m. Retweet
Did your mother ever promise your something growing up? Do you remember being horrifically disappointed when someone didn't follow through?
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:46 p.m. Retweet
On the verge of tears: I would argue that your childhood has everything to do with your adulthood. Counsel, we've talked about this.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:46 p.m. Retweet
Objection: Your childhood has nothing to do with your adulthood.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:45 p.m. Retweet
Is there a reason that the defense can defend before I'm done prosecuting?
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:44 p.m. Retweet
When you were little, a child, did your mother ever take you someplace special?
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:44 p.m. Retweet
Your honor, I'd like to point out this is a waste of the court's resource. She was found guilty last year.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:42 p.m. Retweet
Can you tell me how this team garnered strategy before tournaments? From Beef. What does Beef do to get strategy. She watches stuff.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:41 p.m. Retweet
The court will now here the team v. Jackie for forgetting the HDMI cord, again.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:41 p.m. Retweet
Do you swear to tell the whole truth, the LOOK AT ME I do. You closed your eyes when you said that, I'm not sure if I believe you.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:41 p.m. Retweet
Isn't this double jeopardy? No such thing in #malortcourt.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:40 p.m. Retweet
Our loser in fantasy will take the ACT. Dobby, get studying.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:39 p.m. Retweet
It's confirmed that she's not guilty, but she will take a half-shot because it's Dobby. #friendshot
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:39 p.m. Retweet
This is a kind-hearted teammate, who just wanted to help out her teammates! And get a little something on the side.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:39 p.m. Retweet
Did it affect your teammates negatively? Or did it affect you negatively?
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:38 p.m. Retweet
Why did you pick these QBs? They were attractive? SHE PICKED PEYTON MANNING .
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:38 p.m. Retweet
I'm going to say that you're a good girl and that you just wanted to have fun. Sidebar.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:37 p.m. Retweet
From the jury: "Meagles, do YOU know how fantasy works?" No, that's why I asked. YOUR HONOR, She's eating!
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:37 p.m. Retweet
Did you know that that was not something you do? To be honest, I didn't know that either.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:36 p.m. Retweet
This has expanded to a class action suit.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:36 p.m. Retweet
Could you tell me how fantasy football works? Honestly, no.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:36 p.m. Retweet
Would you please state your name for the court? Dobby.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:36 p.m. Retweet
Next case: Allie v. Dobby, infraction: having four QBs in fantasy.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:35 p.m. Retweet
It's like liquid turf burn. It tastes like Beef's wig. Gasoline. It tastes like I got shampoo in my mouth, which happens a lot by the way.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:34 p.m. Retweet
Hadel: Congratulations, ladies, the nemepups die tonight. #ripYIP
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:34 p.m. Retweet
Due to a previous agreement, the Alpha Dog of the pup litter will be shotgunning a beer instead.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:33 p.m. Retweet
Therefore, ALL of the pups, must take a shot of malort. We need 4 shots for the pups and 1 for the alpha dog.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:33 p.m. Retweet
Judge Beef: We have this group called the "pups," that didn't help their brethren, even knowing their inabilities to get on the flights.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:32 p.m. Retweet
do you, or do you not, have teammates that could have helped you?? Hadel: I FUCKING TRIED.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:32 p.m. Retweet
and just because I really like saying this, I REST MY CASE!
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:31 p.m. Retweet
Then it is fair to say that you are in all of the tools to know when you're flight departs! AND YET STILL! You managed to miss your flight!!
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:31 p.m. Retweet
AND BY YOUR OWN ADMISSION YOU CAN'T EVEN KEEP TRACK OF WHEN THINGS ARE DUE
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:30 p.m. Retweet
This smartphone - does your phone have a calendar app? an inbox email? do you have both of these things? #malortcourt
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:29 p.m. Retweet
Your honor, I'd like to cross examine the witnesses. Even though this isn't how it really works, the Judge would like to see how this goes.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:29 p.m. Retweet
Objection: defense is like totally holding their hands. Your honor, they kind of need hand holding. Judge: I agree.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:28 p.m. Retweet
RT @ashure: "Please state your name for the court" "Alexandra Hu" @allhailcsur: FALSE IT'S QING @ChicagoNemesis #malortcourt
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:28 p.m. Retweet
Defense's witness: And how did you guys get here this weekend? An airplane. Can you explain more about this airplane.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:27 p.m. Retweet
What are your personal organizational skills? "I don't have any."
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:27 p.m. Retweet
You do know that you're on this team? And you do know that you're to be attending our tournaments?
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:27 p.m. Retweet
Sur v. Patrice & Hu for missing their flights to Colorado Cup up next.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:26 p.m. Retweet
Ok, focus. You're in a court of law-ish.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:26 p.m. Retweet
I'm just telling them to not be idiots to move things along.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:25 p.m. Retweet
Reminder: Bailiff must be flexing the entire time and have a heavy accent.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:25 p.m. Retweet
Convo b/w pub. defender & prosecutor: "It was great working with you again." "You know what, bc of that, I'll just let you win the next."
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:24 p.m. Retweet
Punishment: They have to drink @MonsterEnergy in a corner until the next trial can start.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:24 p.m. Retweet
Counsel sidebar: "We've come to a settlement." Witnesses: "Wait, we didn't get to defend ourselves." Judge: "You guys are totally guilty."
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:23 p.m. Retweet
TN: "It's like a batch of flies sitting on a dirty diaper." #malortcourt
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:22 p.m. Retweet
Counsel taking sidebar. Tennessee has to take a shot of malort for disrespect of #malortcourt's start time.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:20 p.m. Retweet
Public defender moving to disbar Meagles, Prosecutor. "I'd like to move to NOT." #malortcourt
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:20 p.m. Retweet
We don't know law. "Google it." #malortcourt
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:19 p.m. Retweet
Jackie says, "No." Dyer says, "I was just closing my eyes. For 10 minutes."
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:19 p.m. Retweet
Do you have a dry eye condition that necessitates 10 minutes of eye closing?
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:19 p.m. Retweet
But the funny thing is that your actions seem to suggest that you do! Is it true that at dinner that you two fall asleep.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:19 p.m. Retweet
"Am I boring you? Do you find this team boring?" IT'S A TRAP! Dyer: "Not everyone." Honorable Judge Beef: "They sound guilty."
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:18 p.m. Retweet
"They both look like liars but I'm going to defend them anyway." Shady, eh?
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:18 p.m. Retweet
Please state your name for the court. "Jacqueline Lai." Is that your real last name? courtroom: "not Li?"
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:17 p.m. Retweet
Swearing on the 11th edition. "I'm not sure what to say now." #malortcourt http://t.co/i33L9Tgds4
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:16 p.m. Retweet
Oh shoot. Nobody was sworn in. RETRIAL. DO OVER. MULLIGAN.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:16 p.m. Retweet
Miller response to Malort: *cough cough*
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:16 p.m. Retweet
The Judge Honorable Beef has spoken. This "ass ugly" photo will be the GroupMe's avatar for 48 hours.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:15 p.m. Retweet
Here is Exhibit A of Miller's "ass-ugly" faces while playing. #malortcourt http://t.co/IxmPbYlVKM
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:14 p.m. Retweet
Kim v. Miller, the Case of the Ugly Picture. Miller: "Objection! Kim's the public defender, she can't defend me!"
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:14 p.m. Retweet
Bailiff would like to know what picture we're talking about.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:13 p.m. Retweet
The rest to come in due time. #malortcourt
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:11 p.m. Retweet
Second is a class action lawsuit against Jackie & Dyer. Infraction: Sleeping at dinner, violating common etiquette laws.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:11 p.m. Retweet
First is Kim v. Miller. Charge is for "sending an ugly picture of me to the GroupMe."
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:10 p.m. Retweet
Honorable Judge Beef has just entered the courtroom. First to read the docket. http://t.co/jxego3F2rg
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:05 p.m. Retweet
CARGO SHORTS were seen in appearance here at #malortcourt by the only gentleman here. "TAKE THEM OFF" chants ensue. Colton agrees.
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:04 p.m. Retweet
What our defendants will be sworn in on. #malortcourt http://t.co/NmnNgtsnBK
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 11:03 p.m. Retweet
Defense attorney, Kim Streff. That's correct, there are no pants here in #malortcourt, or else it is a mistrial. http://t.co/OrQFeM4qqB
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 10:37 p.m. Retweet
Just 24 minutes until we begin #malortcourt... GET READY
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 10:21 p.m. Retweet
"I am really dense! I'm just like dead weight" #nemewho
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 5:19 p.m. Retweet
Carol Li, Court Stenographer, reporting for duty! #malortcourt https://t.co/FjP5Do0z63
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 5:07 p.m. Retweet
"on october 3rd, he asked me what day it was." "it's october 3rd." #meangirls #nemebitches
@ChicagoNemesis   Saturday October 3rd, 2015, 4:21 p.m. Retweet
@GungHoUltimate Wait, don't you have FOUR Nemesis coaches?!
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